i'm not gonna lie. you fucked up. but it doesn't sound like you were in control. it sounds like you're mentally ill - and i am too so please don't take that as another knife or a shot being fired, it isn't. i don't think you should blame yourself for something you did while ill and untreated, especially since you've been under a lot of pressure ever since you got here.
i think you need help. i will comb through the therapists i know to find you it if you need it. i'll pull my limited resources here. i'll even go with you and sit in the waiting room for the first session. but you can't go on like this without getting some help, yusuke. one, you risk doing this again if you don't, and two, you risk hurting yourself if you don't.
i don't know what's wrong or how to fix it. but i can get you to people who can figure both those things out. and if money's an issue i'll help pay. you're gonna be okay, yusuke. i promise, this shit can get better.
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i think you need help. i will comb through the therapists i know to find you it if you need it. i'll pull my limited resources here. i'll even go with you and sit in the waiting room for the first session. but you can't go on like this without getting some help, yusuke. one, you risk doing this again if you don't, and two, you risk hurting yourself if you don't.
i don't know what's wrong or how to fix it. but i can get you to people who can figure both those things out. and if money's an issue i'll help pay. you're gonna be okay, yusuke. i promise, this shit can get better.